Dancing with the Devil
by The-Scarlet-Finch
Summary: SEASON 4 Trying to out-dance the Devil only breaks your toes... Veronica Mars POV after the Finale... because some bad guys look like a bad cold, but they can really be the death of you.


(Florence and the Machine - Never let me go)

A lion doesn't go around the Serengeti screaming to all who will listen that he's the King. Everyone just knows, like some reptile part of your brain is announcing that you are prey in the presence of an apex predator, and you can either be smart and recognize it, adapt accordingly or you are lunch. Penn Epner was no lion, but he strutted around the prison yard like he was. I don't know why I came here today… nothing I can do can change anything.

He's won.

I'm not on my Honeymoon like I should be... But I can't take sitting in the house with dad and Wallace watching me like that... of Pony looking at the door waiting for him, and knowing he won't be coming back. I can't take one more service personnel stopping by, or one more 'I'm sorry for your loss'.

I tried to clean up the streets of Neptune and though I got him behind bars where he can't hurt anyone else. He claimed one last victim because I… wasn't good enough.

Because I let him play me like a Mark.

He sucker-punched me.

Logan had gone outside to move the car. My car. That bomb had been meant for me.

I'm no stranger to losing people; I've known how death works ever since second grade and Marcy Hoffman was taken out of class early by Deputy Sawyer and child services. Dad had explained to me that night when I got home a Truck collided with her mother's car, an accident had stolen her entire family. People lose one another every single day for senseless reasons.

I lost the love of my life… because Penn made a decision to take my future from me. Even now, I can't stop going over that look in his eyes, like he knew he'd be seeing me again. Like he knew he was going to throw a grenade at my life.

He did… he took my whole world.

I thought I'd known how Duncan felt after losing Lily, she'd been as close to a sister as I ever had, and I couldn't accept how all the evidence pointed to him having something to do with Aaron Echolls murder in the Neptune Grand. I couldn't even imagine being pushed that far to lose myself... but I feel like the Universe has just lost gravity, and I'm adrift and frozen.

Logan was right… I'm not a killer… but a big part of me wishes this camera lens was a sniper scope.

I might have taken Penn off the streets, but I've seen how the legal system works in this country from the inside and out. Even the dead pretty blonde daughters of Billionaires can't give a jury enough reason to see past the corruption of the upper echelons of this cesspool.

I've made mistakes, I started counting the victory chicks before they'd hatched, and justice was all but guaranteed. Should have known it would end in a bigger disaster than season 8 of Game of Thrones.

Guess if I thought I was getting a happy ending… I really hadn't been paying attention. Tragedy slipped right in unnoticed like a pizza delivery.

I know what it's like to scrape yourself up off the floor, dazed because life has thrown you a curveball and taken something precious. It wakes time to rebuild. To find yourself again, to adjust to the new normal.

This was never a story about how boy meets girl. I get that now.

All Logan ever wanted was for us to be together, and I took my time because I didn't feel like I could trust myself not to make a mistake... I made them anyway. The ink was barely dry on our marriage license and I guess Life was teaching me about the value of wasted time.

I won't waste any more of mine on Penn Epner. I won't be getting out of the filth of Neptune now I've lost the only reason I'd ever found not to stay.

I had been weighed, I had been measured, and I had been found wanting... I can't Peter Pan my way through the rest of my life.

Spring Break isn't forever, sooner or later, we all have to grow up.

I don't care if you are Big Dick or the Devil himself, I'm bringing some justice to this slice of Hell.

They should all be scared, because I've got nothing left to lose now.

My Name is Veronica Echolls... and I'm coming for you.

(yes, I know the ending was HEARTBREAKING, and I'm in two minds about it... if it gives us more Veronica time, I am all for it, but I hate losing Logan)


End file.
